Sunday, September 11, 2011

remembering and explaining

On 9/11, I was in college and asleep.  One of my sorority sisters came and woke me up to tell me that something terrible was happening.  I went to school in PA where almost everyone who attended lived in NJ and NY.  So, where I was terrified b/c many of my family members, neighbors, etc. worked in DC and some at the pentagon, most of my classmates knew people at the trade centers.  We spent the rest of the day huddled up watching TV, we flipped through all channels where even the home shopping network was talking about terrorism.  Throughout the day, we would hear random sighs of relief as people heard from their loved ones and some cries and people didn't.  Later, we went to a church service at our college chapel; I remember being overwhelmed at the number of people in mourning that actually knew people hurt or missing.  I felt so blessed that everyone I knew was safe but also so sad that so many people weren't. 

Flash forward 10 years, I"m in the safety of my home watching some of the same coverage on TV.  A. is watching some with me dressed in her monkey costume as she is many a morning.  She is very confused as to why we aren't watching her typical Imagination movers or Curious George.  I tried to explain though really found it hard to describe to such a sweet innocent mind.  Here is my attempt at an explanation:
Me: (approximation) "10 years ago, before you were born, some terrible people were mad at America and wanted to hurt us.  They flew a big airplane into buildings that hurt and killed many people."
A: Did they get a bandaid for their booboo's
Me:  Most of them were too hurt, a bandaid didn't help
A: But, are they OK now?
Me: Some went to live with Jesus and some of them are here and are better
A: OK so everyone is ok now
Me: Some of them still feel sad and today we are remembering
A: OK well but mommy they are OK now.  Does their heart still hurt?
Me: Lots of people's hearts still hurt.
A: Were their Mommy's there to make sure they didn't get hurt?
Me: Most of them were adults so their Mommy's weren't there.  I do try to keep you safe but Mommy's can't protect you from everything.
A: It's ok, I don't feel sad, you keep me safe, Mommy.

So, I"m not sure my explanation was too confusing and didn't work or if she understands more than me.  Regardless, I am remembering

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