an extra layer

B. now refers to K. as a kid with an extra layer.  All of the Collins boys are very even keeled.  As Pappy says, "you have to practically kick Pat in the knee to see any expression from him."  B. says that it may keep him from experiencing intense joy, but it also keeps him from sadness.  K. did not get the memo that Collins boys are supposed to skip the emotion and just go on with life. Here are some examples

1) During dinner we have a rule: you have to drink your milk and eat your vegetables before you can have dessert.  K., for some reason, picks and chooses nights whether he is going to fight us on drinking his milk.  This particular night, we had told him a good 22 times to drink his 5 sips of milk.  He looks at me, "you happy, momma?"  "Nope, K. you need to drink your milk."  He looks at Daddy, "you happy, daddy?"  "Nope, drink your milk."  He looks at his lap with two giant tears,  "Nobody happy."

Seriously, how do you not laugh at that?

2) We drove to Gramps' house this weekend for Gramps' birthday.  Riding in the car, A said, "awww man, I have a hangnail.  We get out of the car and K. is pouting.  "What's wrong, K?" I asked.  His reply was, "I so sad."  OK... "Why?" I said.  And, the emotional response, "A. have hangnail."

B. looked at him like he was insane.

3) When making dinner, A.'s job is to set the table.  K. puts out the vitamins.  The adults used to have our vitamins at night though since we did our 24 day Advocare challenge, we started taking them in the morning. Apparently, K. takes this as a personal offense.  Every night he cries that we don't need our vitamins.  One particular night, he tried to give them to B.  B. just simply said, "thanks, Buddy, but I don't need them now."  K. ran to the other room, knocked over a chair and then sat in the middle of the floor not speaking to anyone.  Completely silent.  If anyone walked near him, he turned over and put his head on the floor.

.

Again, an extra layer.  Who is that expressive over a piece of pizza?  It's gonna take a special lady to handle all of that emotion.  On the bright side, he may be VERY romantic

 

the move

This happened a long time ago, but if I don't blog about it, it never happened... right...

A. and I went to a free play this summer and her first question was, "when can I do that?" Well, now, I guess.  We found a little children's theater and she went every Friday for 1 hour for 5 weeks.  Her first week, she came running out saying, "Mom, I got the part."  Well honey, I hate to break it to ya but every kid got a part. hehe.

Those of you that know me, know that my first career was as a recreation therapist.  Every single Thursday, a lovely music therapist would lead us in kids songs with all of our patients that lived at the hospital.  Then, every Thursday afternoon until Wed night, I would sing Raffi and Barney songs in my head.  "This is a song about colors, colors, you see them everywhere...." My favorite was "Brush your teeth."  

When you wake up in the morning and it's quarter to 2, you don't know what to do, you brush your teeth.  ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch

What?  No you don't

Well, this play was "Baby Baluga"  Imagine my happiness when they sent A. home with a CD of all Raffi songs.  Yay!!!  

When you wake up in the morning and it's quarter to 4 you hear a knock at the door, you brush your teeth.  ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch

It's even more ridiculous now....

Well, it turns out that A. did get "the part".  It was the only part with a "move".  Most people had 1 line or maybe 2.  A.'s line was, "I know what you mean, I still feel drowsy, I aught to wake up, but I still feel lazy and lousy.  Then, after Shake Your Sillies Out, her line was, "we jumped and clapped, we clapped and jumped, I don't know about you, but I'm totally pumped."  She was supposed to jump and flex her muscles on "pumped"  We went round and round for weeks.  "Mom, no one else does a move."  "Mom, what if people laugh at me?"  I wanted to tell her that the play would only hold a parents attention while their specific kid was on stage, but I thought she may not like that.  I wanted to tell her that the line wasn't especially funny, but again, I thought she may not like that.  I did tell her that I would be proud of her either way, move or no move.  I also told her that if people laugh, it meant that she did a good job.  Imagine that, but my advice didn't work.  It didn't work until Granny J. came and acted totally crazy jumping around being "pumped".  I guess if Granny J. can look ridiculous, A. can too. :")

The night of the show arrived and of course, it was the worst traffic ever.  Her acting coach, Granny J. sat in traffic instead of hearing Baby Baluga, Shake Your Sillies Out, and Brush Your Teeth.  The good thing was, A. did do the ever anticipated move.  And... a few people were even paying enough attention to laugh.

Way to go, A!!  We're so proud of your theatre debut. Maybe you'll have a future in Music Therapy.  I know a great mentor!

tough questions

Once kindergarten hit, I knew it was only a matter of time before my sweet little girl would be exposed to things that I would rather keep hidden.  The first was the death of a her little friends grandfather.  Though A. hears us talk about our loved ones that have already passed on, she never had questions.  Since DJ's grandfather died, A. has had questions galore. The crazy thing is, she will ask a question, I'll give my best answer and then she doesn't ask another for a week or two.  I think she just has to process.  She started with, "where are gram and Uncle Brian.  -- I went with the easy answer of heaven.  Well, that led to how did they get there and then once I tried to explain that their souls went to heaven but the rest of their bodies are still here then came, " where are their bodies".  So, I did what every mother that has no idea how to best answer the question would do...."I don't know, let's call Gramps."  I totally passed the buck because I didn't want to tell my little girl that her gram's body is now in a small little box and her Uncle Brian is now buried. Gramps gave us some good advice and I left it because the questions seemed to stop.  Well,  fast forward a week and the question was, "How did uncle Brian get under the ground?" She wanted to know how Daddy helped to carry him and who held his head.  I did my best to explain a casket and pall bearers.  Another week passed and she simply said, "tell me the story of Uncle Brian."  I chose to go with the music that he liked and how he coached hockey.  I think she wanted the story of his death because then she asked, "can he hear that music now that his body is in the ground and his heart is in heaven?"  I don't baby...

Today though, today took the cake on tough questions.  We got a letter home today about a "stop, drop, and cover" drill.  It's the drill now mandated by the state to practice for an intruder or a gunman.  It's the drill that has to be done yet makes my little innocent girl not feel so safe anymore.  The letter just said to inform the kids so that they wouldn't be too frightened.  I just told A. that tomorrow there would be a drill like a fire drill except that they would stay in the school and go under their desks.  "Why, Mommy"  I froze in my tracks.  I wanted to ignore it or say just to play a game.  But, the reality is, she has to live in a new era.  An era where no place is completely safe.  So, I told her that it is to practice in case someone came in that wasn't supposed to be there.  "Why, Mommy."  uuhhhh.... "because sometimes bad people come in and your teacher has to keep you safe."  The questions stopped and I went on to turn on paw patrol or wipe a nose or something.  I turned around and tears were streaming down her little face.  "What if there is a bad person there tomorrow?"  "Why do I have to cover my eyes?"  "How will I know where they take me if they do?"  "What would they do to me if they take me?"  And, just like that, a little piece of her innocence was gone. I answered as best as I could, trying to tell her that her teachers would keep her safe and we would come and keep her safe.  Just when I thought we were coming out, she said, "but, someone came to Gramps's work." She put together the fact that Gramps was working at the Navy Yard on the day of the shooting and that she had to practice to keep away from "bad people".  Again, I did what any mom over her head would do, we called Gramps.  Gramps told her that it's ok to be scared but that it is just practice.  He said that he practiced before and that is what kept him safe.  He reassured my sweet little girl we would always do our best to keep her safe and her school will too.  But, she is still scared to go tomorrow.  Thankfully, I called in the mom reinforcements.  She now has another mom to drop her off at school instead of riding the bus and I promised her that the mom representation will give her an extra hug.  Now, to wait a week and see what question pops up from her ever processing yet slightly less innocent mind.

remember that time

Remember that time when you have so many changes.  Changes that are amazing and awesome and also very normal.  Changes like kids going to school and potty training, and switching work schedules.  Changes that make you so busy with daily logistics that you forget to stop and write so that you remember this awesome time in your life.  Yep, couple that with a lost camera cord so that I can't get any of the pictures from our trips, festivals, Halloween or even the tantrums and little newly underweared bum bums off of the camera and you know where we've been.  I promise, I will spend some time between buying something from the 4th school fundraiser and seeing patient's and running to the teeny tiny little potty as soon as the potty alarm beeps to focus and write.  I do want to keep this up so that my kiddos will know about their lives as wee little ones; I do want to remember this crazy time;  I do want to keep our long distance family updated. So, I will, I will, I will.... soon